I remember staring at the horizon on a gray morning at the end of winter in my small hometown in Eastern Finland. I had just finished that conversation you have at the end of a relationship about how you both need time and about how “who knows maybe in the future…”, with full knowledge that the future would never ever come. And a guilty relief about it never coming.
Not every relationship is a great love story. Sometimes i’ts just good until it ends and it’s fine. It’s not always easy to figure out when to call it quits, and how to do it when there is no drama surrounding your feelings. It’s not uncommon we just subconsciously choose to wait it out. To let the situation cool and die of attrition rather to make big moves and, in honesty, be the one guilty of ending the damn thing.
Of course you don’t leave any real relationship without a mark on you. When you spend time with another person you develop countless little ties with them. There are all these habits and rituals you come up with together and don’t really think about it that much until it’s time to let them go. There’s a whole language you develop with each other. All the words that you say, or don’t say, and all the hidden meanings within them. A secret world that no-one will be left to inhabit once the connection is severed.
A name I wont be called again, tells about that specific moment at the twilight of a relationship. It’s the time when you know it’s over, or have known for a while, and are just waiting it out. It’s about the things that were kindly left unsaid, and how painless it can be when two people aren’t meant for each other. It’s about forgiving each other for not tending to the relationship. Forgiving yourselves you let it all fade out.
Looking back on it, “A name I won’t be called again” makes me feel belated relief, a tinge of nostalgia and a whole lot of pride. I feel like in this song I was able to tell a painful story with honesty and yet retain a level of mystique and beauty in it. I could not sum up my mission as an artist more aptly.
You can hear the song on Spotify (or any other music service of you choosing). Tell me how the story relates to your experiences and how it made you feel!
Talk to you soon!